Zachary

The band

The other band

Cooking stuff (temporarily inactive...)

 
Like a wedding day, all that planning and it's gone. Lucky for us, we didn't plan much this year. :) Of note, it was Zach's first Christmas and he did great. A bit overstimulated at times, but had lots of fun with the family. (It was mutual). Plenty of great food, lots of haul, pinochle, and who could forget grandma squirreling away her goodies midday, right before she put her pants on, then her new underwear over her pants, to go to bed. At least they weren't on her head like I showed her...
posted by hbt at 9:55 AM

 
Seems there are more and more decorated houses each year. It's amazing. I love driving through neighborhoods on a dark, foggy night to look at the glowing lights. We still need to take Zach for a late evening stroll to look at lights. He looooves lights. :) Though the houses are not much to see in the day time. Cords and cables. Ugly wire structures. Deflated pools of nylon that turn into giant snowmen and Santas at night. All covered in yucky wet leaves. Where do these people store this stuff??? My goodness, if we decorated our house like that, we'd have to move.
posted by hbt at 12:57 AM

 
Mother's day has a whole new meaning for me now. Actually, it was all about Zach. We've not taken so many pictures for mother's day in a long time. :)

I'm honored to be a mom now.
posted by hbt at 3:48 AM

 
He loves the swing, and the mobile, and other battery sucking toys, but we've discovered new applications for non-baby things that have made our lives easier. Babies eat, sleep and poop. Anything you can do to make these three tasks easier to manage is worth the time and money.

* Every bedroom should have a dimmer switch. Instant ambiance, and it makes putting to bed and midnight diaper changing less harsh.

* Get a rocker/glider that is a nice piece of furniture, not baby furniture. I purchased my glider many years ago for reading before I moved out.

* We had issues keeping our baby boy from peeing up the back of his outfits. Every diaper change = outfit change. Tedious. First we bought a bunch more onsies. And now we put a maxi pad across the top of his diaper. Silly, but it works!

* Adult bed in the baby room. Or a futon, which is what we have. If he won't go down, it's easier to plop on the futon and nap with him, especially if his spastic arms keep him up. Some day if we have a second baby, we'll invest in a good twin bed to replace the futon, and eventually give it to Zach when he graduates from the crib.

* Odor eaters. Little canisters with vents and some weird substance inside that absorbs odors. They're in the cleaning aisle of the grocery store or Home Depot. Use next to the diaper pail. 'Nough said.

* Clock radio with CD player. The radio is the only way I keep in touch with the outside world right now, plus Zach can go to sleep to some baroque.

* Blank journal. Use it to record stuff you need to tell the doctor at checkups, and write down your questions because you'll forget. Take it to the doctor's and use it to take notes. I image the journal will be an interesting read later.

* Waterproof pads for the beds. It really sucks to put the baby down on your bed while you get ready, only to find a big wet spot when you pick him up. Save your mattresses (yours, the crib, the bassinet, the spare bed...) and invest in waterproof, washable pads. I got ours on sale at JCPenny.

* Burp clothes. AKA spit rags. Instead of "designer" baby towels, or even cloth diapers, we opted for a big package of car cleaning towels at Costco. They're bright yellow (stains don't show and they're easy to find) and they're super soft.

* Lots of tubs and baskets. Babies come with lots of stuff. We have a basket downstairs for diaper and clothes changing. Another big tub to rotate out clothes that no longer fit (YES that's happening already!) Tubs for toys. Buckets for bath items. Another emergency diaper basket in the car. I could go on.

* TV + DVD player. Ok, we don't have this yet, but plan to. My laptop works for now. If you're stuck in the baby's room, it's nice to have entertainment. Later Zach can watch his movies and Baby Einsteins without occupying the main TV.

* Dark curtains. We sleep strange hours, as most new parents do. My main sleeping block is from 9am to 2pm. We hung dark curtains in the bedroom to keep the sun out. Or buy a sleeping mask... Sometimes I use both.

* A backpack instead of a diaper bag. We're using a basic bag with several inside mesh pockets, but eventually we'll switch to a laptop backpack. LOTS of pockets. Lots of dividers meant for papers and computer, great for separating diapers from toys from clothes from snacks. Top it off with padded back and straps for long strolls through malls, fairs, zoos and the like. More practical than any diaper bag we've seen, and cheaper than designer garbage. And it's "manly"; my husband can be seen in public with it.

* Tissue at the changing table. To prevent diaper rash, we use tissue to pat him dry before the clean diaper goes on. It's soft and disposable. Perfect.

* Chalk board. We use it to write the baby supply shopping list, to-dos, and to record when we made the last bottle so we know when to toss it. In the first couple weeks, we used it to track feedings and diaper changes until he stabilized. Later Zach can draw on it.

And don't forget all your moment-capturing gadgets: digital camera, digital recorder, photo editing software, scanner, web site for the relatives, and the like. :) Blogger rocks!!
posted by hbt at 4:16 AM

 
It's my midnight anyway. I guess. I don't know what my "night" is anymore. I don't even keep track of what day it is.

Slowly but surely I'm learning what's it's like to have a child. So far it doesn't compare to any other experience. When Zach and I slipped a step on the stairs yesterday, I was scared in a whole new way. I've never been scared for someone else, forgetting myself completely. My leg could have been broken and I wouldn't have realized it. He was crying and couldn't communicate if he was hurt or just stunned. I had to figure it out. No time for panic, or feeling guilty. And I was afraid to move him until I knew why he was crying. So kept him on the step and nuzzled his face with mine for a minute until he calmed. I figured he'd keep screaming if he was hurt. He stopped. No harm, except to my nerves...

He's a boy. And if he's like other boys, he'll rough and tumble. Heck, if he's like I was, he'll rough and tumble. Who knows how many times I came home bleeding. How many concussions? It's amazing children live through childhood. And now it's my turn to nurse and comfort, and hope and pray he doesn't do anything serious; to let him explore and reach, and go on adventures, like I did. To go against the struggles I already have about over-protecting. How do moms do it? How do they let go?

Geez he's only 7 weeks old. It's a long time before I need to be worrying. :)
posted by hbt at 2:55 AM

 
Needless to say my life has changed in the last 6 weeks (Zach will be 6 weeks tomorrow). With someone so dependent on us, I've learned to lower my expectations. Not about Zach of course! but about what I can get done.

I'm a multi-tasker from way back. It's natural for me to think 5 steps ahead so I can do things in the most efficient manner, many times out of sequence. That's fine if you're not interrupt driven...well...

My to-do list used to be long. Now I never have more than 2 to-dos on the list at any time. I might have a 3rd or 4th on the back burners of my brain, but they're not on the list. Up through yesterday it was:

1. Taxes
2. Baby announcements

Now it's:

1. Baby announcements
2. Family financial plan

This gets mingled in with house chores, bottle washing, Heather washing and the like. Even then, I set out to do one thing in the house until it's done. Sometimes it takes 2 days to finish the dishes...but hey...they get done.

I find my new system rewarding. I tend to finish more of what I start and I don't feel stressed or rushed (although submitting our tax return at the 11th hour did not give a warm fuzzy). Maybe I'm on to something. Maybe it will all fall apart when I try to rejoin the band? Maybe it will turn to chaos when I return to work? Hard to say.
posted by hbt at 2:02 PM

 
Now that we're settling into our routines, time to reminisce about the experience...

Zach was born 10 days late. I wasn't uncomfortable and he wasn't stressed so we opted not to induce right away. Two weeks is the cut off. Thursday, one week after my due date, I got my first "stress test" to make sure the little guy was okay - check fluid levels and stuff (what am I, a car??) I was already having five minute contractions. Who knew? One cm dilated however was not considered much progress...

Saturday things picked up and I could lightly feel the contractions. I snuck in a big nap and when I woke up I walked around the house to spur the contractions on. This light laboring went on all night. Jason went to bed and I woke him up about 5am. We got ready and I called the hospital. Seems I wasn't in enough pain yet. I needed contractions 3min apart, not 5, and my pain needed to hurt so bad I couldn't talk or walk. Hmmm... Okay.

Jumped in the shower to ease off the pain that was kicking in. Two hours later I was meeting all pain qualifications (oh baby) so we took off for the longest car ride of my life (and Jason's).

By the time we arrived, I was sobbing, shaking and damn tired from being up all night. They put me in the triage room where I was forced to sit upright. Pain, pain, pain. After a half hour of who-knows-what, my dilation was still only 1 cm. I have never been so disappointed in my life. Now I was really sobbing because their policy is you must be 3 cm to be admitted. I was never going to make it! The battleaxe midwife proceeded to check my fluid levels with an ultrasound and stopped looking half way through the exam, logged it as not having enough fluid, and I was thus admitted. For someone unsympathetic to my situation, she sure did me a favor.

I walked to my labor room because walking was better than SITTING in a wheelchair, and I could stop along the halls to work through the contractions. Drugs. I wanted drugs. My plan was to hold off and "see what I was capable of". Well, I was done and I wanted drugs.

They did not come fast enough. After taking my vitals, they had me go in the shower. This helped me relax and stop sobbing. An hour later they fetched me, but the idea of getting out was enough to stress me out the contractions got out of control. By now it was about 8 or 9am - I forget.

Mom and Dad showed up. Jason's mom showed up at some point as well, but I don't remember when.

Okay. Drugs. I got an IV, and a second drip for drugs. With the first poke the nurse said "oops, your vein exploded". That's going to leave a mark (yup). Needle in the side of the wrist it is. And the drugs worked fast - in seconds and I was, ahhhh, not in pain. My eyelids had weights on them. Someone was talking. Could I focus? Nope. Time for night night and a lovely three hour nap. I vaguely remember the anesthesiologist coming discussing my epidural. Then the drugs wore off and the contraction pain woke me up. Damn.

Here comes the epidural, finally. This is a 10 minute process and you have to sit up and be extremely still, contraction or not. I was proud of my feats of strength. Once the epidural was in, we were in business and I proceeded to get many cords and cables plugged into me: IV, pitocin to get me to dilate, epidural, baby heart monitor (external), contraction monitor (external), blood pressure cuff, catheter. And I couldn't lay down anymore or the numbness would creep up my chest and make it hard to breath.

Hours later, his heart rate was dipping lower than comfortable for the doctors so they took me off the pitocin and stuck an oxygen mask on my face. And they put me up and on my side because the baby liked that better.

Hours later, after being flipped like a pancake several times and trying to nap, I wasn't dilating anymore. They changed the external contraction monitor to an internal monitor (don't ask) to measure the size of the contractions, not just the frequency, and they turned the pitocin back on.

Hours later, I was miraculously 8-9 cm dilated. Time to get the show on the road. The doctor said we would try a vaginal delivery, but if the baby got too stressed, we'd go emergency cesarean. Meanwhile, she recommended forceps or the vacuum to help him out. We went with her recommendation of the vacuum.

Ok, here we go. I was fortunate to have many sporting experiences to draw from. When the coach says last lap/sprint/bulldog drill, you stupidly believe him and run your little butt off, only to find out you have to do it again; you'd be amazed how many laps you can actually run when someone makes you do it.

Push, push, push.

15 minutes later, Zachary was born. They laid him on my chest and I was amazed at how warm he was, and how big - geez - no wonder that was hard. Then he was whisked over to the scale for his appgar test by the pediatric doctor. Didn't score high enough: too pale, not crying much, too sleepy, so away he went to the nursery for a couple hours. Meanwhile they sewed me up.
I had an episiotomy, which I won't go into detail about except to say it is not a convenient place to have pain, swelling and stitches... Jason actually watched the whole thing. Didn't get woozy - I was proud. Apparently the vacuum wasn't helpful, except that Zach seemed to like it. When she affixed it to his head, his heart rate would go up... Go figure.

Hours later, in the recovery room, I finally got my baby. We were both tired and it showed. Jason was also tired poor thing - both he and my parents stayed up with me the entire time, sneaking in naps when they could. We spent the next 2 days in the hospital. He didn't have eating figured out right away so we stayed an extra day to make sure he was okay. At the end of it all, the doctors were very happy with his recovery and his head was looking good considering its trauma. He had an enormous bruise where the vacuum was and a serious cone head. He did NOT like his head touched; must have had a headache poor thing.

And Tuesday we went home!

Now that it's 2 weeks later I ask myself if it was worth it. The 30 hour labor. The pregnancy. The sleepless nights. The life change.

Having this baby with Jason was the best thing I ever did. I would do it again in a heart beat.
posted by hbt at 11:23 AM

 
I haven't felt this bored since I was a kid. Yesterday was a particularly bad day, though today I feel better. The due date is tomorrow. Our downfall was predicting the baby would be early, which meant the last 2 weeks were looong. One can only putter around the house for so many days in a row. The bedroom is more than ready. Even just this weekend, J.T. replace all of the outlets because some were loose and some didn't work. Talk about looking for things to do...

This is the year of the boys. Our friends had twin boys 2 weeks ago (6 weeks early). One boy should be able to come home this weekend, though the other will have to stay longer. My cousin is due to have a boy in a month or so, and our friends just found out their baby is a boy. And our other friends have a planned c-section for their boy tomorrow (yes...on our due date...) Gatherings will be quite an adventure! After hearing my male friends talk about their growing up, I'm afraid of what will get blown up by these rascals!
posted by hbt at 1:19 PM